Arfles from Shy

Ok.. so I went on the second date.. @_@ 
There is one detail I left out from the first date.. This date person is a woman...

So as I was about to cancel the second date my 78yr old dad, happy as a clam, is all like, "Hearing that you are taking out a woman is making me so happy" ... D: ugh.. So out to the second date I went.. what a horrible idea. While it's true, I identify as pan, I don't really communicate with women very well. 

Early wed morning she sends me a text asking if I'm ready to go see "Black Shadows".. um.. so I finally just ask, "Are you sure you want to see "Dark Shadows"?", so then she confesses to really want to see Avengers, but was afraid I wouldn't want to see it because I saw it too many times. So I insisted we go to Avengers than, because it was a really awesome movie. We also changed theaters because the showtimes were more convenient.. thank goodness, a dine in theater would have costed me another $50 lol.. 

We met up at the theater.. I waited inside and made sure to get there early... 5 minutes after the time we were supposed to meet, she wasn't there.. I looked at my phone.. no call.. I walked to the door and there she is, waiting outside. So I go out and tap her shoulder, she shrieks and gives me a hug, I scared her.. She went on for about 5 min about how much I scared her..oh boy.. 

So we walk inside, and up to the Box Office. Thank you AMC for the gold tickets... Free Movie for two please.. Of course she waits at the side, as I expected not wanting to pay. This time, all we get is water.. so the theater experience cost me $8 in bottled water theater price. We go in and sit down in plenty of time, she's a quiet movie watcher.. Thank goodness.. 20min of previews, 2hrs and 22min of movie :D get out and and the first thing out of her mouth:
MAJOR RED FLAG: What do you want the name of your first son to be? Bah what? She says, "of course there's plenty of time to think about names" and then I respond, "yeah, plenty.. plenty of time.." to where she responds, "but you never know, slip ups do happen har har har" O_O; ... OMG lady.. it's only the second date.. wtf... I realize she's a little older.. menopause approacheth.. After we discuss our conflict in names, hers all biblical, and mine all regal, we head home..

Then I get an email from her.
2nd MAJOR RED FLAG: Just to let you know as we get serious, I'm on Probation. To paraphrase her email. Serious dating?? what? I don't even consider a movie a real date.. you can't talk during it.. so there's no getting to know or seeing what we have in common.. 
In my head I swore! (even my dreams are censored usually!) HOLY $%$# .. And this is why she's single. So first I'm all like, "You know, we've only met in person twice.. I'm no pro on dates, but the second date is probably not the best time to say that.. so uh.. what are you on probation for?" She's off of probation next January for having a fight with her ex boss and ex co-workers. Which doesn't seem bad to me, so then I ask, "They had you arrested for an argument? Thats a little extreme??" Then she explains further, "Well I used some colorful 4 letter words at them to explain what I was going to do to them, and I had a knife on me.. So yeah.. arrested.. heh?" 
O_O 

So I've postponed the third date.. oh look, gotta work late... So glad I haven't taken her home, my dad, after hearing all this, still wants to meet her badly. My mom, the sane one, says she never wants to meet this woman. Ever.. Also says she's way too old for me anyway.. (only 4years older..)